El año de la España Mágica
¿1979? ¡Vaya, hombre! ¿Tengo que escribir precisamente sobre esa fecha y no sobre cualquier otra de las muchas comprendidas entre el referendo de la Constitución y la apoteosis de la España Hortera?
En esta última andamos, pero no quiero hacerme mala sangre ni sentar plaza de borde. Seré festivo. No hablaré aquí de política por más que la política fuese entonces importante y sea hoy repugnante. Hablaré sólo de ese año, el de 1979, y de cómo en su transcurso saltó mi mundo por los aires y dejó de ser mi vida lo que hasta entonces había sido.
¿Cambió también España? Eso dicen, pero allá ella. No es asunto que me incumba. Voy a confesar, padre, algo terrible. Me acuso de que no me personé en las urnas el día en que mis supuestos compatriotas desfilaron ante ellas para dar el sí a la Constitución. ¿Y cómo rediez iba a hacerlo si la cosa me pilló en Marruecos dando clases (pocas) en la Universidad de Fez, disfrutando de la vida (bastante) en las dos orillas del Estrecho, fumando pésimo hachís de Ketama (a granel), seduciendo a todas las señoritas (muchas) que el demonio ponía a mi alcance y atando los últimos cabos sueltos de mi magna obra Gárgoris y Habidis?
Constitución, democracia, posfranquismo, tejerazos… No tenía yo tiempo para tales minucias. Solo lo tenía para beberme el vivir a chorros. Era un acratón, y lo sigo siendo. Las cosas de la cosa pública nunca me han interesado. Que gobiernen los políticos, esa gente tan aburrida. Para eso los pago. Fui, padre, un hombre puro hasta que en 1993, ruborizado, avergonzado, perdí el virgo y voté, pero lo hice en defensa propia, que es circunstancia atenuante. ¡Llevábamos once años de socialismo a cuestas! Yo solo me meto en política cuando quien manda me toca los cojones. Franco lo hizo. Felipe, también. Zapatero… ¡Uf!
A lo que iba… 1979 fue para mí, a todos los efectos, el año de la España Mágica, el de Gárgoris y Habidis, tochazo que en realidad había roto aguas ―las de su primera edición― un poco antes: llegó a las librerías el 28 de diciembre del 78. En tal día como ése, el de Inocentes, tuvo que ser, puesto que yo lo era, inocente, e ignaro aún de lo que se me venía encima: éxito, fama, prestigio, popularidad… Una catástrofe. Una dolencia que es imposible detectar a tiempo. Cuando se percibe el primer síntoma, la metástasis es ya irreversible. No hay nada que hacer. Nada. No vale cerrar el pico, ingresar en un convento o irse, como yo lo hago, a las antípodas. Coger esa enfermedad, la de la fama, no es, por suerte para muchos, fácil, pero dejar de ser famoso es imposible. Yo me he rendido.
Total: que salió el libraco y mi vida de hippy amamantado con pipones de charas en Kathmandú y transterrado a Soria cambió, como digo, de arriba abajo, y no siempre ni en todo para mejor. Mi camisa, hasta entonces, había sido la del hombre feliz: sin bienes raíces (excepto la guardillita de la calle de la Madera en la que tantas cosas sucedieron, tantos polvos eché y echaron otros, y tanta gente vivaqueó), sin un duro y sin enemigos. Pero fue aparecer el libro ―que en eso, al menos, resultó mágico, sí, pero de magia negra― y llegar las envidias, las cuchilladas, los sinsabores, las enemistades gratuitas y el dinero, ese cabrón que sólo trae complicaciones y obliga a vivir por encima de las necesidades.
Tenía yo leído, en Ortega, que el mal de España no es la sífilis, como aseguran los franceses, sino la aristofobia (¡leña al que destaque!), pero nunca lo había sentido en carne propia. Fue puñetero y chocante, pero sobreviví y, encima, me divertí. Rabia rabiña. Todos los años se aprende algo nuevo.
Lo demás fue fantástico. Mi quehacer televisivo, en Encuentros con las Letras, se consolidaba. La autoridad competente, obedeciendo a presiones del Partido Comunista, del que yo había renegado quince años antes, prohibió un debate sobre mi libro en el que interveníamos Carlos Vélez, Juan Cueto, Savater, Arrabal y yo. No pasó nada. ¡Menuda se habría armado si hubiera sido al revés! Las ediciones del mamotreto, contra pronóstico, se sucedían. Agustín García Calvo, Torrente, Aranguren, Dámaso Alonso, Caro Baroja, Racionero y, de nuevo, Arrabal y Savater lo presentaron en una tumultuosa sesión, hoy legendaria, del Ateneo, que se puso a reventar. Manolo Cerezales publicó una crítica desmesurada en el ABC proclamándome patriarca (sic) de las letras españolas con un solo libro ―cuádruple, eso sí― y Joaquín Garrigues, herido ya por la leucemia, lo leyó en el hospital y se descolgó con un articulazo en El País (eran otros tiempos) donde sostenía que todos los antifranquistas, empezando por él, se habían equivocado en lo concerniente a su visión de España hasta que en eso llegó Gárgoris ―¡comandante de Cuba yo con estos pelos!― y los mandó parar. Areilza, poco después, dedicó a mi libro una tercera del ABC, palabras mayores, comparándolo con el Quijote y la busca del tiempo perdido. Era aquello hipérbole manifiesta, por no decir delirio, pero lo agradecí. Almorzamos luego juntos en El Bodegón, acompañados por Antonio de Senillosa, y con los dos mantuve a partir de ese momento larga y fecunda amistad. Tan fecunda, dicho sea de paso, que de ella, por transversa vía, di en fugaces amoríos con la gentil Cristina de Areilza, hija menor del prócer, que murió no mucho después, víctima de la misma enfermedad que se llevó a su pariente Joaquín Garrigues y descabezó en agraz la democracia. Ésta nació capidisminuida: Dionisio Ridruejo, al que tanto quise, ni siquiera vio morir a Franco. Éramos todos liberales. Senillosa se mató en la carretera y a Areilza lo secuestró el Alzheimer. Sólo yo sigo vivo. ¡Maldita sea!
Vuelvo a la España Mágica. No todo fueron flores. También hubo palos y reyertas. Cito, entre quienes me molieron las costillas, al bendito Paco Umbral, con el que me las tuve muy tiesas, a Carmen Martín-Gaite y a Leopoldo Azancot. Éste me acusó de antisemitismo. Él sabrá por qué. Yo sigo sin saberlo, pero su artículo, que apareció en El País, desencadenó una bonita zapatiesta en la que entré alegremente al abordaje con una tizona del Cid entre los dientes, un alfanje cordobés con vaina de marroquinería en la diestra y un garfio sefardí en la siniestra. El mito de las Tres Culturas, que hoy me parece de cartón piedra y tramoya barata, quedó, a partir de ese instante, servido y guarnecido. Mea culpa, pero también de otros. Fue un cristo, un alá y un yavé. Así éramos entonces: gente brava. Hoy reina en la república de las letras la paz de los cementerios y de la corrección política. ¿Por quién doblan las campanas? Ese lento tañer que rasga el viento… Escribo este artículo en día de Difuntos. No es tropo, sino data. ¿Será por algo?
Primavera, verano y otoño del 79. Me llamaban de todas partes, y a todas iba. Es mi modo de ser y era yo al escritor de moda. O sea: me metí en mil líos. Dar aquí cuenta de ellos, siquier sucinta, no es posible. Lo dejo para mis memorias, que están al caer. ¡Temblad, malditos!
El noventa y nueve por ciento de esos lances lo fueron de faldas. Me buscaban las chicas, embestía yo ―torito en puntas o, acaso, corderito― a todos los trapos, me llevaban ellas por donde querían con el engaño del percal de sus blusas y la seda de sus medias, y salía yo a menudo de aquellas batallas de amor en alberos de pluma, o de lo que ―aquí la pillo, aquí me la cepillo― se terciara, con banderillas de fuego puestas en todo lo alto.
Me corrijo: eran ellas quienes se me cepillaban. Siempre es así.
¡Jesús! ¡Qué tiempos aquéllos y cuánto mujerío, cuánta copa, cuánto porro, cuánta noche y cuánta libertad, promiscuidad y golfería! ¿Me pongo moños y coños que no son míos? ¡Qué va! Al contrario: me quedo corto. Soplaba el viento a mi favor e hinchaba mis velas. Era yo entonces, según una de las tres mujeres a las que dediqué mi libro, el pirata más hemingwayano de la costa y, además, salía en la tele, había corrido mil aventuras en los siete mares y… Lo diré, porque ellas lo decían: era guapo. ¡Quietos todos! Hablo de oídas, las doy por buenas y que se chinchen los feos.
Allá por junio, si es que no fue por septiembre, la CNT organizó una asonada cultural en el teatro Martín, que lo había sido de revistas y coristas, y su última jornada corrió a cargo de Bernard Henri-Lévy, Arrabal y este servidor de nadie. Fue la caraba. Pasó de todo. Había gente hasta en los casquillos de las candilejas. Nos rodearon los fachas y durante siete horas ni los ratones, que los había, pudieron salir de allí. Entre los presentes se encontraba, casi anónimo aún, un joven periodista, Pedro J. Ramírez, que al día siguiente publicó en el ABC un artículo, titulado Arrabal, Lévy, Dragó, en el que sostenía que lo nuestro había sido el acto político más importante del posfranquismo. Como suena. Lo leí, cogí el teléfono, llamé al autor y… Bueno, ésa es, seguramente, la razón de que esté yo ahora escribiendo para El Mundo una croniquilla del año en que España fue mágica. Arrabal y Lévy también son colaboradores, y algo más, como yo mismo, de este periódico.
Llegó diciembre y me dieron el premio Nacional de Literatura: un millón de pelas. Las cogí, me compré un Land Rover y, como Woody Allen, salí corriendo. Estaba harto de tanta fama, tanto premio, tanto lío, tanta chica y tanta leche. El 1 de enero, en la plaza soriana del Chupete y en presencia, como testigos, de los Sánchez-Gijón, Aitana incluida, estrellé una botella de Codorniú contra el capó del vehículo, le impuse el nombre de Gárgoris y enfilé con su morro la ruta de Estambul, de Aleppo, de Damasco, de Ammán… Quería llegar a Kabul. A bordo íbamos mi hija, mi novia y yo. Anochecía. A poco de salir de Soria nos cerró el paso, plantada en la carretera, una lechuza. Frené a tiempo, voló y lo tomé por buen augurio.
Lo era. El año en que mi mundo saltó por los aires había terminado y yo volvía al camino y, como la lechuza, al vuelo: feliz, desconocido y libre.
Pero eso es ya otra historia. Mágica, por supuesto.

PESAO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Deliciosa crónica de aquella España que me hubiese gustado vivir en la piel del que nos la cuenta. de momento espero esas memorias y me releo el libro que para su autor descodificó el secreto de tantas faldas. Le admiro sin envidia que es como mejor se admira.
Tenía 16 años cuando leí su libro. Lo hice en unos pocos días. Y me permitió engatusar a varias chicas plagiando, siempre de boca y utilizando la memoria, sus historias mágicas.
Gracias
Estoy harto de tantas Españas y tantas patrañas. No he leído su libro Gárgoris y Habidis. Lo haré si, como con Muertes Paralelas, llega a mi casa firmado y dedicado. Lo que sí espero es que en sus memorias, señor Dragó, escriba sobre muchos temas, pero deje un poco de lado a Zapatero, que, por su último libro, ya sabemos que es un gilipuertas -quizá el adjetivo más honroso que podríamos dedicarle.
Buen artículo éste de arriba, Dragó. Viva mucho, escriba mucho más.
magnífico, me deja con la miel en los labios,,,,
¡Qué bonito! gracias por compartirlo y permitirme volar de su mano.
Saludos.
Que crónica tan buena sobre españa.
Que tema tan bueno.
Que bueno vivir esa epoca.
Muy interesante tema.
buena historia sobre la España y ole!
De todas formas es bueno revivir buenos momentos en la historia.
La historia me pareció buenísima epa!
Que buenos recuerdos…
Realmente es toda una historia momarable que bien!
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