EL COBAYA: Elixir (3)

Hoy hablaré de afrodisíacos. Seguro que crece el número de mis lectores. Acabo de intervenir en el magazine matinal de Susana Griso y tengo un subidón de testosterona. Esa excelente periodista es la feliz propietaria de las piernas más hermosas de toda la Unión Europea. Se lo he dicho a pantalla abierta y se ha puesto colorada. El rubor la favorecía. A ninguna mujer en sus cabales le molesta un piropo. Me consta. ¿Saben ustedes, por cierto, cuál es la etimología de esa palabra, antaño tan frecuente y hogaño tan en desuso? Viene del griego: pir (fuego) y opos (rostro). ¡Fuego en el rostro! ¡Qué metáfora tan certera! Me cuenta Susana, ya por los pasillos de Antena 3, que hace un porrón de años le ofrecieron la posibilidad de convertirse en icono publicitario de una marca de medias. Medias, digo… Las de verdad, las que todas las chicas llevaban cuando yo me inicié en el asunto que no tiene enmienda. No los horribles pantis, que son un cinturón de castidad y convierten en maniquíes de escaparate de mercería barata a las que los llevan. La confesión de mi interlocutora me deja grogui, porque las medias fueron el primer afrodisíaco que yo tomé. Lo sigue siendo. Al hacer el equipaje meto siempre dos o tres pares en la maleta por si alguna chica cariñosa se cruza en mi camino. Mano de santo. Iba a hablar hoy del Cialis. Es mi nuevo afrodisíaco. Tomo una dosis de mantenimiento: cinco miligramos al día y… Pero Susana Griso, hace una hora, me dejó tarumba con su feroz cruce de piernas (llevaba minifalda) y no ha podido ser. Quédese el Cialis para la próxima columna. Ya sé, ya sé que ésta de hoy es, con perdón, una cachondada. ¿Y bien? ¿No es el sexo salud? Disfruten de ella.


Publicado en: ...el 16 Julio 2010 @ 21:26 Comentarios (233)

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    Estimado escritor:

    Ya leí lo que opinaron algunos de este asunto sin importancia (el episodio que relatas en tu nueva novela) que levantó un polvorín en media bloguesfera y hasta Costa Rica cayeron cenizas; también en el blog de ese dictadorcillo seudo escritor ocurrente que es Alfredo García Francés me despedazaron -según ellos- por opinar diferente a 450.000 visitantes de ese estercolero de blog, y solo por defenderte porque te hicieron -según ellos- una crucifixión bloguera. El cobarde éste de García dejó el comentario de un amigote “catedrático” para que me diera -según ellos- el tiro de gracia. No aceptó mi derecho de respuesta como defensa de los ataques de este cabezón “académico”, un viejecito insignificante al que no le puedo dar una paliza de frente.

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  3. A 30 Octubre 2010 @ 20:41 Poeta Frank Ruffino dijo:

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    Pues espero hables pronto de esa “poción” que suena (no hay más) mágica. No sin dejar de manifestar que el mejor afrodisíaco siempre sigue siendo la mujer (ni modo: tal vez me desdiga si llega un alienígena pletórico de feminidad). Aquí en Costa Rica en una canción se dice: “Qué lindas que son las ticas”. Espero algún día vengas a comprobar por ti mismo esa aseveración que no creía. Pensé, antes de ir a la Madre Patria, en 1991, que era puro chauvinismo. Jolines: las españolas están buenas, mas las ticas están buenazas! Esa mezcla de indígena y español, y en algunas regiones con la exuberante negritud de la piel, hace que uno pierda la compostura de este gran castigo y vicio que tenemos los hombres: LA MUJER.

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